Early in our relationship, I told her that I didn't really care about gifts much. Source: Shutter Stock urnotmywife: Bringing lunch to my job. Since she leaves for work before I wake up I don't usually get to see what she's wearing and by the time I get home she's already in her relaxing attire. Source: Shutter Stock _More Equal: Something thoughtful that reflects me as a person. Source: Shutter Stock Which of these ideas is your favorite? I made an offhand joke about how I'd rather play with army men with her than get a new i Pod.. We had our fights, or struggles, but when I saw that box of army men, seeing how she remembered an offhand comment from such a long time ago..was the most thoughtful gift I've ever received, to this day. Still looks nice but it's something about seeing her in head to toe business attire that makes me want to... Men aren't all simplistic in the sense we all only want sex and food, just like flowers isn't the be all and all for a girl. I’ve heard things like “When a guy’s relationship ends, he replaces her.When a woman’s relationship ends, she mourns,” or “He’s just hooking up with such-and-such to spite the ex-girlfriend,” or “Guys just don’t care” and other nonsense.In the same regard, when a relationship ends, it is much much harder for a guy to go back and discuss and revisit and talk through and explain, etc. In fact, guys like to keep their emotional spectrum focused on a tight range of emotions – somewhere between amusement and contentedness.So any interaction that a guy knows will bring him out of that sweet range of emotions is an interaction he’s going to do everything he can to avoid.I realize it probably came off jerky, but when I cut off communication, my heart is in the right place.
I totally get it – picking out presents for boys is really, really hard.It’s painful because it’s a belief that something that is impossible is could be possible…and therefore sets countless impossible expectations into motion.In the case where you dumped the guy, one common reason is that the guy doesn’t want to be alone, he doesn’t want to deal with his grief over the breakup and he doesn’t want to “deal with himself.” When he jumps into another relationship, he can get a dose of external female validation and derive a feeling of false sense of self-esteem and self-worth from her positive attention.It has its cost though and eventually devolves into a crippling neediness.